Wednesday, January 14, 2009

A letter to Barack Obama from Yetta Bronstein

January 14, 2009
Hon. Barack Obama
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington, DC 20500


Dear Mr. President,

As a follow-up to my previous letter, I would like to offer you a few good ideas free of charge, Mr. President, for changing our country. This is no squid pro squid, so here goes:

1. Since Oprah raised the bar by giving everyone in her audience a new car, how about bailing out GM, Ford and Chrysler, only if they give every American family a new hybrid car? Including illegal aliens. Why alienate them further?

2. I understand it costs our government $40,000 a year to house, feed, guard and rehabilitate each of the 2.2 million people in prison. Then give them seven days in which to be adopted by an American family or be put to sleep. The money saved would eliminate our trillions in debt and provide the empty prisons for housing the homeless, soon to be in the millions.

3. Abolish income taxes. Instead, the entire family weighs in on or before April 15th and pays $5 a pound for each member of the family, including pets, and other occupants. The aggregate total from 300 million people would exceed an income tax total. This method also diminishes the obesity problem, except for the filthy rich.

4. Take Congress off salary and put them on straight commission.

5. Place truth serum in the Senate drinking fountain and install a mental detector in both houses of Congress.

6. Require all doctors to publish their medical school grade averages in the telephone book. An A+ doctor could certainly be trusted for brain surgery.

7. SAT tests should be given to all members of the Electoral College.

8. Allow guns in homes but decrease the velocity of bullets by 98%.

9. Charge $5,000 for a marriage license and $5 for a no-fault divorce.

10. Same sex marriages would become legal nationally and hermaphrodites should be allowed to vote twice.

Thank you for your consideration of my ideas, Mr. President. I ran for President myself in 1964 and 1968, losing both elections by a landslide. You can read all about it in my book, The President I Almost Was.

Sincerely, Mrs. Yetta Bronstein